|
|
There are a total of 7900 jokes in 14 categories |
There are a total of 7900 jokes in 14 categories |
 |
|
 |
 |
| Posted by JenReo on 14-Aug-2005 | Position Available Immediately: Apprentice Sith Lord, Dark Side
Consulting Group
An unexpected position has opened up in the Dark Side Consulting
Group for an Apprentice Sith Lord. The ideal candidate for this
position would like galactic travel and possess a complete
understanding of and competence with the Force, or demonstrate a
willingness to learn.
Duties include: Performing competitive intelligence, hands-on
intervention in support of the Sith Master's planning
initiatives, ability to travel the galaxy widely, and operating
a variety of laser-powered hand weapons and high-powered
space/air vehicles. Some slaying of enemies of the Dark Side is
also required, which may be performed using the Force or hand
weapons.
Qualified applicants would possess good communications skills
(especially when speaking in menacing whispers), and would be
action-oriented individuals and risk takers. A background in
study of the Force (light side or dark) is desirable, as would
typically be acquired by those with advanced degrees or
significant course work in Jedi Arts from the University of
Coruscant. Applicants should also be familiar with holographic
projection equipment, possess a valid galactic pilot's license
(for all classes of ships), and must show a willingness to give
in to their hate. A proven track record of using fear and/or
Jedi mind tricks to control others is also desirable, as is the
ability to speak several galactic languages. Ideal candidates
for this position would also have no children or other living
relatives who are strong in the ways of the Force. (A new hire
would be given several weeks to meet this requirement.)
Compensation for this position is commensurate with experience,
and is extremely competitive for this field.
Benefits include a generous severance package, a company
starship, and a dark-colored clothingallowance. The Apprentice
Sith Lord reports to and works closely with the Sith Master, and
experience in such small, team-based organizations is vital to
the success of the master's plans. Discretion is also highly
valued, as is the ability to see the future before it happens.
Applications will be accepted until the end of July. Transmit
them holographically to: jobs@darkside.com.
*****************************************************
Dark Side CG (tm) is a small and highly-focused organization,
founded a long time ago. Our core values reflect the short-term
advantages of harnessing hatred for institutional power and the
long-term desirability of controlling the galaxy. We provide
direction to our partner organizations through knowledge
management, incident control and our rapid on-site intervention
expertise. Our partnered organizations include the Imperial
Senate, the Hutt Gambling Collective of Tattooine, and many
large software companies.
| |
| | 0 people have rated this joke:
|
|
|
 |
 |
 |
 |
|
|
